reflectedlight | 🌙 Inbox - Marc Spector's Dead Drop

???

?????

"Are you immortal?"

Offers... out... cup of coffee...?

"I'm not avoiding the question, I'm thinking about it, but are you?"

Edited 2026-04-04 06:30 (UTC)

"Ah, you got me. Guilty. What gave it away?" He will take the cup of coffee with a smirk, thank you. "But I know I wasn't the only inmate in a similar situation. Maybe not immortal, maybe something else. Maybe another deal or another method or Talent. But there are plenty who've come here in similar circumstances to this hypothetical."

"Well, no. Then I'd only be trapped here for no reason. This whole thing only works if you'd be properly dead otherwise. I'm so sorry that happened to you."

He didn't have to think about it that hard. His idea of what the Barge does and why is pretty crystal clear.

Edited 2026-04-04 06:41 (UTC)

He holds the cup in two hands, blowing off the steam idly. "Not looking for sorry. It doesn't do any good for me or the next guy. But think about it, Steven. Other inmates are in the same place. How are you going to deal with that? Someone who doesn't want this gift of life or doesn't need it? Someone actively resenting the system and this higher power demanding change or imprisonment? Learn a language with them? Skip down the hall to the library together?"

He takes a sip.

"They'll probably just kill you, it won't make a difference to them. They've already been declared guilty, what's one more on their conscience?"

There's a pause.

"I said I wasn't telling you to be miserable. But I am trying to scare you." He holds up a finger. "With honesty, but scare you nonetheless."

He glances up, just to check. Don't worry, no eye contact.

"Is it working?" He can do some illusions if needed, he loves those.

"Fraid it's not making me scared, no. I actually like learning these things from people with more experience. It means I can think about it before I really do hurt someone."

It's not dissimilar to what Jedao had tried to go over with him. Everyone can be helped, but not everyone can be helped by you.

Kylar is irritated by something abstract that Steven represents, he's pretty sure. That means they're just not going to like each other. He just has to try to be okay with that. Stay polite. Do the job.

Steven puts in a second pod. It's Earl Grey, shhh. He can have his tea and eat it too.

"I'm afraid if someone killed me here, I'd have hurt them very badly, and I'd make an effort to make sure I understood why that all happened so I wouldn't do it again."

This is not sugary sincerity. This is Customer Service Voice.

Edited 2026-04-04 08:41 (UTC)

There's an exhale through his teeth. Learning is fine, but does he actually get it? Probably not. Sorry, Marc. He tried.

"And I'm saying sometimes they'll kill you and there simply is no reason. You could have done everything right and they'd still do it." There is more he wants to say like how terrible people can be but that seems redundant.

"Well, that is what the Dancer's for. It's not very safe here, I do know that.

Why's this important for me to know?"

Yeah... he doesn't really trust that thing. Sure, it stopped Marc in the moment that was useful but.. nah. Kylar's not buying it. But he's not going to sit and tear down Steven's trust in not-quite-Hat-guy.

"Better question, why isn't it important?" Is he being facetious or does it have a point. Who can say? He makes it sound serious, if in his usual relaxed way.

"No, it is important. But I already know why it's important to me, it's me not being killed by lunatics."

He is thinking specifically of Ashton and the Eleven, honestly, who are the scariest people he's ever met in person.

"I already worried about that, I've taken steps. But why's it matter to you? You don't seem to like ... want to protect me, it's more like you're annoyed that I'm not - not displaying fear the same way you would?"

"I'm hurt." He feigns, a hand against his chest like the equivalent of clutching pearls.

But how does he explain to Steven that he's attached to Marc without saying that and also that because of the temp situation it's officially his job to care? Well, he doesn't. He can't. So he lies, somewhat.

There's a dismissive wave. "Not annoyed." Is he? Isn't he? Maybe not for those reasons. But it doesn't matter.

"If I don't seem the protecting type, what type do I seem like, Steven?"

A little frustrated that nobody's told you what you're supposed to be doing, only what you're supposed to be not doing. And then you've tried most of the things you're not supposed to do and can't figure out why you weren't supposed to do them in the first place, so you've given up on trusting advice.

"At home? Dunno. Here? Isolated, mate."

His lips thin and he sips his coffee loudly. Ohh, he did not appreciate that. Now, he is annoyed.

"Do I even want to know what gave you that idea?" Thanks, he hates it. Probably because it's right.

Steven bounces his shoulders. Oooh, that felt like he was correct? Now he feels a little mean, but goodness' sake do we have to talk about Steven getting murdered for no reason?

"It's hard to deal with people when you can't really make yourself care what they think of you? Which isn't good or bad, just, I dunno, a specific way to be that - that people usually have a good reason for adopting? An' it's definitely easier to put on if you find other people kind of untrustworthy and confusing straight from the jump... but is hard to turn back off?

Granted, hard to turn on, too. I'd love to be able to selectively not care what people think of me, but that ship sailed, I think this is just my personality now."

He does not like this. This should be going the other way, to some degree. His eyes narrow a little as he takes yet another sip of his drink.

There's an exhale that follows like he had been holding his breath for some time. "Well, hate to disappoint, but you're wrong." And he does not elaborate.

"Oh, that's good!"

Cheery.

"Most of that's pretty glum if I was right."

"Yeah." He grimaces. A finger taps at the cup idly before he realizes it, catches himself and stops. Total neutrality. He's fine. Not a single nervous habit to speak of.

"So what if I told you that I am trying to protect you."

"From being killed? Well, that's very nice of you.

But I - I don't think anybody can, realistically." A quick, exhausted smile. "Last month, I think I mentioned that my fear of dying is not seeing the people I love again? I'm not about to slag on how scary and painful it must be to die here, but the Death Toll means that my biggest fear, which is that she'll never even know what happened to me, won't come true. So - well. There is that."

Unless someone blows up the fucking boat, but we're not there yet in the timeline.

"I think you misunderstand what I mean when I say 'protect'. Physically? If I'm around, sure. I can try to prevent your demise." He holds up a finger for emphasis on 'try'. "But I am well aware that there are no guarantees. I know I can't protect anything, not really. That's why I'm here in the first place."

He readjusts, suddenly uncomfortable. It's probably the topic, but he's also still standing like a weirdo. "But the more you're aware, the better you might be able to protect yourself. That's why I'm saying these things. That's why I'm trying to scare you." Another waved hand. "Even if that failed spectacularly. The important thing is that you get my point. But I wouldn't call any of that being nice." He's allergic. He can't possibly be nice, he's a horrible person. "Necessary, maybe."

"So who's 'she'?"

Steven's smile gets sincere.

"Yeah, but you don't actually have to protect me, do you? I'm just somebody. You couldve just left me, I think that is nice, even if you wouldn't. Couple people I know would've saw me getting killed as something I deserve for being stupid and would have just watched it happen, yeah?

I don't - I don't do well when I'm afraid. I only make smart decisions when I stay calm, so I try to do that. I'm on a few, er-"

A quick eye-roll.

"Honestly, the sleepwalking always gets worse a side effect of a medication I take to keep from having panic attacks... Can't decide which is more irritating, but I've been warned off going off of the Ativan quite well by Dr. Varker so naturally I'm walking all round the ship like a complete muppet...

She's my mum, I - er, she was quite ... she wasn't well when I was growing up, and it's only been within the last few years she's recovered? So. We take care of each other."

"What couple people? Here?" Because that's pretty messed up, Steven. Even Kylar can acknowledge that.

All he really has to say to that is 'ah'. Familial bonds aren't his strongest suit. He is familiar with them but always from a distance. He settles on something easy. "Does she know you're here?"

Edited 2026-04-06 02:03 (UTC)

"Oh, you know. The grumpy hard cases, not any of the staff." Cheery! He doesn't blame them. They are here because they're not quite up for empathy at the moment. The Eleven system's Six and Three, he means. Ashton, probably. Maybe the Ghoul? Maybe Sebastian, that dude is HARD to read.

"She doesn't. I didn't ..." Huh. Why didn't he tell her? "I didn't want to worry her? It was a bit of a well, it's go now or go never so I went. And, of course, I'll be back without any time passing, so I can tell her all about it if she doesn't think I've gone mad."

"That's not a couple, pretty sure that's half the ship, Steven." Well, a quarter. He's seeing why Marc has his work cut out for him. This is... difficult.

"Yeah, maybe.. don't tell her. It does sound pretty mad taken out of context." Especially worlds with little to no magic. Kylar's not really sure where their world sits. Is this Moon Knight the usual or the exception? He's guessing exception. "Maybe you could ask the Admiral to send her a note or something, if you're worried. I mean, yeah, time isn't supposed to move. But the big guy makes mistakes. I'm not sure I'd always trust that. If I were you, anyway."

o no.......

"It's worth asking, yeah...."

Another concern to have.

He sips the coffee again.

"How're you feeling, by the way? Medicine should be kicking in by now."

And those handy dandy sedatives.

"What?"

Smash cut.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

do u wanna timejuml

ye

1/2